At least with the Bennifer break-up, we knew it was coming.
But Brad and Jen? Excuse me while I charge the defibrillator. My heart’s truly in a semi-frozen state.
Spotlight savvy couple, Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston, announced last week that they are “separating.” Seven years after their first date, four and a half years into their marriage and they’re ready to walk away from what was not only was an aesthetically pleasing runway duo, but potentially perfect offspring.
Darn. Some people just cannot think of others for a change.
America has really been slighted this time. Just one child, that’s all we ask for. It’s not like we’re asking for your fame and fortune, only something small to end the public’s curiosity.
So what caused temperatures to rise between the couple, pushing them to end their wedded bliss?
Rumor has it the two had a bit of a difference in opinion when it came to aspirations of family. Allegedly, Pitt, 41, felt his biological clock was tick-tick-ticking a bit faster than Aniston’s, the 35-year-old ex-“Friend,” who was putting off the carpool and diaper table for her career.
That six-letter c-word always causes trouble. It tears more public families apart or drives them into counseling than alcoholism or scandal. Well, maybe not, but it still strikes up quite the controversy.
God knows once we get into the mega-millions, per gig, the pressure to keep that career kicking just heightens.
If only the majority of America had that problem. Aniston, you should be happy you had a run in “Friends,” honestly now. You became not only a pop icon, a topic at the dinner table, but you are consistently listed in America’s Most Beautiful People and get to cozy up next to that hunk of yours every night.
Excuse me if I do not understand your thought process with this one, or sympathize for that matter.
There hasn’t been any news over the year of scandals, of abuse, dissent or anything for that matter except happiness. The press couldn’t even catch Pitt scowling at his wife, or even looking at her cross. Nothing. Zilch. Their marriage was cleaner than most of average suburbia. Squeaky clean.
All we can think, based on speculation has been fueled predictions of the split from the tabloids, is that it was about the kids. Someone has to carry on the Pitt legacy, right?
Aniston didn’t want to have to deal with the wonderful period of pregnancy, fearing that it could hurt her gleaming-career. She’s just been all over the big-screen since the end of “Friends,” putting even Jude Law to shame when it comes to dominating the media.
Sense the sarcasm?
Granted, she had a great run on NBC, wasn’t even all that bad in “Along Came Polly” and “Bruce Almighty,” but we all know that you’re financially set, so why let your marriage shatter due to your career?
This couple has officially been added to the book of Hollywood has-beens, at least as far as relationships go. Listed with the likes of Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise, Bruce Willis and Demi Moore, Jennifer Lopez and what’s-his-name, Ben and P. Diddy and a multitude of other celebrity exes, Brad and Jen definitely win the “shocker” award.
Shocking for masses of women, ages 12 to 62, who fell in love with Pitt the first time they saw his name scroll across the movie screen.
Shocking for men as well, but I doubt they were that invested in the high-profile marriage. Moments after the wire story was finished, the word that they were heading for separate beds spread like wildfire. So be the nature of gossip.
In the meantime, since we can’t change the past, if we can’t look forward to beautiful kids between the two, at least one thing rings with hope: Now, they’re single.
Just wait until VH-1 compiles a special about that one.
— Kaitlin Thaney can be reached [email protected]
