By Raffaela Kenny-Cincotta, News Staff
As the social fabric of Egypt unravels, the Syrian government poisons its own people and the US government contemplates military intervention, the American public has been asking themselves the most poignant question of all: What in the world is going on with Miley Cyrus?
Contributing to the Miley Cyrus media circus is not something I do willingly. Just by looking at her, it’s obvious that this dead horse has been beaten senseless (zing!), but I can’t deny the stronghold that this story has on the national conversation. Therefore I will begrudgingly oblige the public demand for an examination of yet another child star coming to grips with adulthood. When my readers say jump, I say “how high?”
If you are one of the few Americans not enthralled with the idea of celebrity, you may ask yourself, ‘Why do Ms. Cyrus’s recent antics at the Video Music Awards and her new image have so many people up in arms?’ It’s quite simple, actually. It is a story of sex, drugs and pop music. It is a story of lost innocence. It is a story of a girl gone wild. Miley has proclaimed to the world that she’s not Hannah Montana anymore, and she is doing it as vehemently as possible.
The thing that bothers me most about the ‘new’ Miley (other than the highly criticized use of black minstrelsy in her performances) is the fact that she’s doing this whole newfound sexuality thing all wrong. If we’re looking back on recent history the best example of a successful sexually awakened pop star would be Britney Spears. Although Britney had her own trials and tribulations later in life, when she hit the scene post – ‘Baby One More Time’ with videos like ‘Oops I Did it Again,’ she was a sexual firecracker. Let me remind you that like Miley, Brittany also had an innocent Disney channel image to shed. But the key with Brittany is that she was suggestive. Unlike Miley who now parades around half naked, Brittany wore a skin-tight red jumpsuit. Spears accomplished tantalizing her audience while still having most of her body be left to the imagination. Miley is so in-your-face with her self-discovery that it comes off as disingenuous. It’s like a child fervently trying to prove how mature she is my throwing a temper tantrum. Look at me! Look how grow up I am! Are you looking? Good, because I’m a grown up now and you can’t stop me!
Obviously, the easiest way for squeaky clean Disney Channel stars to shed their former image is to sex it up a bit. But with Miley, it isn’t like this was a slow transition. She went from starring in Nicholas Sparks film adaptations to chopping her hair off and grinding on Robin Thicke so fast we all have whiplash. Plus, the reason her new image feels so cringingly fake is because of where she comes from. And I’m not only talking about how she was on Disney Channel.
Miley, listen to me. You sang “The Climb,” a song that will be played at 7th grade school dances until the end of time. Your father is Billy Ray Cyrus. Billy. Ray. Cyrus. He popularized the mullet and now suddenly you’re running around yelling ‘West Side!’ with grills in your mouth? (Speaking of Billy Ray Cyrus, he’s been eerily quiet throughout this whole debacle. It makes me think that once you have an awkwardly sexual photo of you and your daughter published in Vanity Fair, all authority over her kind of goes out the window.)
You look ridiculous, Miley Cyrus. Please stop. Turning your career into a bizarre romp of adolescent antics is alienating the only fans you have, tween-age girls. And I don’t think their parents appreciate all the questions about what ‘dancing with Molly’ might mean.
Spotlight Playlist: Girls Who Rock Harder Than Miley Cyrus
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“Think” by Aretha Franklin
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“Screws Get Loose” by Those Darlins
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“Dead End Justice” by The Runaways
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“You Know I’m No Good” by Amy Winehouse
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“Borderline” by Madonna