By Megan Jicha

It’s Monday night. You just finished a long day of work, classes or both, and you’re at your significant other’s house for some quality time in front of the television. You want to watch “Monday Night Football,” but she wants to watch “For Love or Money 2.”

Who gets to choose? It may seem like a small problem, but it may address a much bigger issue: Who wears the pants in the relationship, and how does that affect its dynamics?

European authors, Em ‘ Lo, “self-proclaimed Emily Posts of the modern bedroom,” according to their website www.emandlo.com, attempt to address this issue in their books, and “Nerve’s Guide to Sex Etiquette for Ladies and Gentlemen” and “The Big Bang: Nerve’s Guide to the New Sexual Universe,” published in 2003 and 2005, respectively.

The London-based duo discuss more than just remote control conflicts, delving into other dominance-related matters, like when and where a couple goes out together and what they do, and what tolls the relationship takes if one person is more dominant than the other – or if the playing field is even.

Em ‘ Lo’s advice on who gets the remote control? Get a TiVo.

But many students said they feel like even the smallest relationship issues aren’t that simple.

Allison Finney, a sophomore communication studies major, said when she’s in a relationship, it’s OK for her beau to get the clicker – “As long as if I want the remote, I’ll get it too. It’s give and take, man,” she said.”I feel like sometimes when a guy or a girl has more power in a relationship, it almost takes over the other person’s life. They almost replace their life with their significant other’s. It’s almost like you’re not living your own life, but you’re living your life for your boyfriend or girlfriend.”

She admitted that everything can’t always be perfectly balanced – decisions have to be made, and sometimes one person must compromise for the better of the relationship. But the deeper the sacrifices, the worse off the relationship will be, she said.

“When it comes to personal decision making, that’s where the line should be drawn,” Finney said.

Another Northeastern sophomore, who wished to remain anonymous due to her own sensitivity to the issue, said she felt differently, valuing the ideas of chivalry and dedication to one’s significant other – particularly from Prince Charming to his princess.

“I always wanted things my way and he didn’t give into me all the time,” she said of her ex-boyfriend of several years. “I feel like a guy should just do whatever it takes to make his girlfriend happy.”

Middler criminal justice major Jen Perugini disagreed, saying gender roles have been blurred by the decades.

“Now guys expect girls to call them first,” she said. “I’d rather have a guy call me, but with everything going on after the women’s rights movement, I guess that’s what we wanted.”

Holly Peterson, a sophomore sociology major, said she used to be the dominant member of her three-year relationship, but when her boyfriend went away to college, her control lessened and their chemistry suffered.

“I feel like relationships can work with compromise,” she said. “I feel like my relationship sort of fell because for the first two years I owned him and then for the last one [after he had been in college a year], I didn’t [control him anymore]. It should have been more give and take in the beginning.”

Ryan Lee, a sophomore graphic design major, said he would be turned off by a demanding girl.

“It just depends on what level a control freak they are,” he said, advising brief background checks before signing away your heart. “I think before you even get into a relationship, you should figure out if she’s going to be controlling.”

While Finney agreed, she said it may be easier said than done.

“I feel like people say they wouldn’t [want to date somebody who is too controlling] and then they just get drawn into it,” she said. “It should be balanced.”

The equation becomes even more complicated in a homosexual relationship when the stereotypical roles of gender aren’t available. When two guys or two girls are together, responsibilities are blurred.

“I think it’s more about personality than [gender],” said Dan Abrams, a sophomore biology major. “It completely depends on the relationship. Sometimes one person’s personality automatically becomes more dominant and the other person goes along with it because they don’t really care and they go along with it. Or it just goes both ways, and it just goes back and forth.”

Abrams said since gender stereotypes are slowly being washed away, there is little difference between a dominance struggle in homosexual relationships versus that of a heterosexual one.

He said the issue and its solutions vary from couple to couple, and while dominance might work for one set, it won’t work for another. That’s what makes people compatible, he said – one person finding the yin to the other’s yang.

“Personally I think that if you’re OK with [having one person be more dominant], then yeah, let it happen, but if not, you’re going to hate it,” he said. “It should not happen across the board. It depends on what you’re looking for, and