By Rachel Boulton

Defying gender was the goal of Kate Bornstein during her meet and greet session for Northeastern students as a finale to “Coming Out Week” sponsored by NUBiLAGA last week.

“I am not a man. I am not a woman,” said Bornstein repeatedly throughout the talk. “I call myself a traveler.”

Bornstein expressed her difficult journey growing up.

“School laid it on thick. It was the first place that I discovered that anyone can be punished for not being a ‘real’ woman or a ‘real’ man.”

Bornstein was born a male, but decided after years of struggle that she would be more comfortable as a lesbian. Bornstein read from a play she wrote,that recounted the conversation she had with her mother discussing her decision to not live as a male, but instead as a female. This ultimately changed their mother/son relationship into a mother/daughter relationship. Her mother initially rejected Bornstein’s change but eventually she came to terms with it. However, before her mother died, she asked Bornstein, “Who are you?”

That is a question that Bornstein would hear over and over again throughout her life.

Bornstein is a transsexual who has made a career by talking about the struggle to form an identity that could be accepted by society or at least any pocket of society that would be open to the “traveler.” Being classified as a man or a woman did not work out, hence the rejection of a single gender.

So, what was Bornstein’s inspiration to come out and talk about her life to numerous college campuses?

“Well, it’s not the architecture,” Bornstein said with a smile. “It’s really just radically queer-sex-positive-gender-bending fun. These people are strong and you don’t necessarily see that all the time.”

Students that attended the talk responded positively to the speaker.

“She’s an inspiration. I have struggled with my own gender as well,” said a sophomore American Sign Language Interpreting (ASLI) major, who wished to remain anonymous. “She was a great speaker, I was very moved.”

Bornstein has written a series of books that deal with “gender bending” and discovering identity.

“My most difficult book to write was ‘My Gender Workbook,” Bornstein said. “I wanted to make sure I had more questions marks than periods. I had to question a lot of things I didn’t want to. I had to develop a sense of humor.”

The actor turned author asked the students, “Is there a single identity to hold you?”

In other words, does your gender encompass your identity, or do you define yourself by numerous other things such as your career or your family?

Bornstein also encouraged the students to, “come out, come out, whatever you are.” Bornstein said everyone should be proud of his or her sexuality, be it gay, straight or anything else.

“It is interesting to be exposed to a different view. To hear her story and her experiences,” said Evelyn Shields, a sophomore ASLI major.

So, who is Kate Bornstein?

She said that she is whoever she wants to be. Bornstein may not adhere to a single identity, but she certainly has a lot of character and humor. Things that perhaps she would have lost if she let society dictate her life, she said.