As I’m writing this, my bathroom is in trouble. The toilet isn’t working. Neither is the shower or the sink. The pipes are backed up, and my roommate and I are anxiously awaiting a plumber to come fix things.
The drains have never worked well at my apartment, which I’ve lived in since September. And the reason has been pretty clear – the girls who lived here last year were disgusting. They would flush anything down the toilet:’ cigarettes, floss, paper towels, you name it. And that has caused everything to slow down.
We’ve lived with it, because up until about a week ago everything was working fine, more or less. But then things started to decelerate, and yesterday, everything stopped.
Just a heads up:’ I’m going to use my plumbing problems to talk about Congress. But don’t worry, I’m not bringing Samuel Joseph Wurzelbacher ‘- better known as ‘Joe the Plumber’ into it. I can’t stand that guy.
Just like the pipes in my apartment, politicians in Washington have been messing with how they govern for a long time, and now it’s causing problems. They attach huge appropriations amendments to bills to fund pet pork projects. They use absurd elements of parliamentary procedure to attempt to control the outcome of events. And they have been doing this for so long that it seems like they have caused some enormous problems.
All weekend, senators have been fighting about President Barack Obama’s stimulus plan. It passed in the House of Representatives, but the Senate can’t agree on anything. They haggled all weekend, and it looks like they will vote on it Tuesday. But even then there will be two very different stimulus bills, and the House and Senate will have to make it work somehow.
Washington politics have been inefficient for years, with government officials regularly making bad choices for the country to serve a small portion of society (sometimes, it seems, that small portion might be themselves). And that has come to a head now, as Congress has so far been unable to send a bill to President Obama.
A quick review, for those who don’t remember the School House Rock jam that explains the lawmaking process:’ The House and Senate each have to pass a bill, then it goes to the President, who can sign it or veto it. If he vetoes it, Congress can overrule him with a two-thirds majority. It gets a bit more complicated after that, but ‘I’m Just a Bill’ really tells you all you need to know.
What Washington needs is someone who can clear up this mess – someone who can clear up the pipes of politics and let governing happen again. I was hoping it would be Obama ‘- ‘O the Plumber,’ anyone? ‘- but I fear that might not be the case.
We need a government that serves us. If this Congress cannot pass a stimulus package, which economists agree is vital to our economic security, what else will our legislators let us down on?
We need more money for schools. We need to make a plan to get our troops out of Iraq, and find a way to stabilize Afghanistan. We need to reinstate the assault weapons ban. We need to make healthcare affordable and accessible to everyone.
We have so much to do, but I’m afraid Congress just cannot do it. They need to reach across the aisle, make reasonable concessions and come to a deal. Both the House and Senate have Democratic majorities, and we’ve got a president eager to pass an economic stimulus bill. They need to solve this problem somehow, and move onto the next.
And, now, if only the plumber would get here.

‘- Matt Collette can be reached at [email protected].