By Matt Collette

Comedian Jim Gaffigan, best known for his appearances on Comedy Central and a Sierra Mist advertising campaign, performed stand-up in Blackman Auditorium Monday, opening this year’s Homecoming Week.

During the sold-out show, Gaffigan mused on what he said were the finer things in life: escalators, hammocks and bacon.

“There’s never anything wrong with sitting down and eating bacon. Greasy lover bacon. But you can’t eat bacon all day, because it’s horrible for you,” he said. “And you know it’s bad for you when a healthier choice is a doughnut.”

Gaffigan spent a large portion of his show musing on food, and examined bacon further. He said society knows how bad bacon is, since it is banned by major religions.

“I love bacon, so I got to go for the bacon jokes,” said freshman engineering major Rob Meissner when asked about his favorite jokes of the evening.

Gaffigan gave a running commentary on his own jokes. His alter-ego, which was Gaffigan speaking in a quieter and higher pitched voice, was regularly shocked and appalled by his own subject matter.

“Is he really just going to talk about bacon all night?” the voice asked at one point.

Audience members said they enjoyed his alter ego.

“I love when the whole time he gives a running commentary of what someone else is thinking,” said Nora Tuite, a middler marketing major. “The running commentary is by far the best.”

Though Gaffigan’s stand-up did stray from bacon, most of the night’s comedy revolved around laziness and junk food. The audience laughed loudly to jokes about elevators.

“I definitely prefer the easy way in life: I see an escalator and I get excited,” Gaffigan said. “Sweet. All I got to do is keep my balance.”

Probably Gaffigan’s most famous joke is his analysis of Hot Pockets, the microwavable calzones he views with pure contempt.

“There’s always two Hot Pockets in every box, you know one for you to eat and regret and the other one to have in your freezer until you move. Or I guess you could use it as a measuring stick for how drunk you got. ‘Yeah, I’m not going to eat that. Guess I’m OK to drive,'” he said.

Gaffigan’s set also turned to religion. He compared his wife’s Catholicism with his own, and pondered Jesus’ miracles.

“You know Jesus performed so many miracles. And you know there was this one guy who was obsessed with one of them,” he said. “‘Hey, you’re that Jesus guy who turned water into wine.’ ‘I’ve performed a lot of miracles in my time.’ ‘Well me and my buddy, we love white wine. ‘I also rose people from the dead.’ ‘That must be some strong-ass wine.'”

While students said they liked Gaffigan, the opening act, a comedian named Rich Brooks who often tours with Gaffigan, didn’t quite satisfy many in the audience. Most of Brooks’ set was spent comparing life in New York with his hometown in Tennessee and lamenting that his ex-girlfriend left him with three disabled cats to care for.

“He was not that funny, kind of a hick,” Tuite said.

Her roommate Nicole Fichera, a middler architecture major, agreed.

“It was OK,” she said. “Blue collar comedy just doesn’t do it for me.”