Every Tuesday afternoon, I work a table for the Husky Energy Action Team (HEAT) at the Student Group Fair for incoming freshmen. Our table is decorated with plenty of give-a-ways to attract students, from stickers to buttons and fliers to T-shirts. But our glow-in-the-dark condoms are the most intriguing. Left over from our “Do it in the Dark” energy-saving campaign from the spring, the condoms proved to be a crucial element to recruitment at the fairs.

That is, up until two weeks ago, when my table was approached by a university official who informed us that parents were complaining that students could pick up condoms at orientation. For the remainder of this letter, I’ll give you a brief note of what I would like to write in response to a complaining parent:

Dear Parent,

Seriously? You are complaining that your son or daughter is receiving an object to promote safer sex. Your kid is going to be in college. It is 2008. The time has come when you should accept (or even expect) your child to have sex. Get over it. In an age where one in five Americans carries a sexually transmitted disease, wouldn’t it be more appropriate for you to be thanking me? Not to mention that the age group with most teen parents are 18- and 19-year-olds. Condom offerings on my table should be an answer to your prayers. So unless you are dying to be a grandparent, come to our table and get your student a condom. Better yet, instead of giving him a Bed Bath ‘ Beyond or Barnes ‘ Noble gift card for graduation, ship him off to Boston with a few boxes of condoms.

– Daniel Abrams is director of marketing and public relations for the Husky Energy Action Team and a middler environmental science major.