It’s not often that I get to discuss Jennifer Lopez in this space, so when the opportunity presents itself, I’ve got to jump all over it (no pun … ok, pun intended).

Anyways, the Yankees and Devil Rays kicked off the baseball season by splitting a pair of games this week, the beginning to an already maxed-out year of ball hype.

Raises glass for toast.

Here’s hoping the boys of summer don’t turn out like the massive box office flop from last summer, “Gigli,” starring J. Lo and Ben Affleck (remember when people didn’t totally regard Ben Affleck as a total idiot? Neither do I).

The movie, hyped in the entertainment media frenzy of Bennifer, took on almost epic proportions.

“Every relationship has a bull and a cow. You’re the cow,” Affleck told Lopez’ character at one point in the movie. Only later, after a sickening and deplorable attempt at a love story, J. Lo cuddled Affleck saying “Every relationship has a cow, huh?”

Ugh.

Now commonly viewed as one of the saddest attempts at moviemaking in the history of film, Hollywood types can only wonder what went wrong.

On the verge of a hugely anticipated baseball season brimming with good plot lines, what if the same fate holds true? What if the baseball season doesn’t turn out to be all it’s cracked up to be? Gasp.

What if, what if, what if.

First, take a look at some of the top story lines heading into 2004:

* Yankees-Red Sox animosity reaches new levels

What if the Sox-Yanks fiasco turns out to be all blown out of proportion? When a Grapefruit League game gets the kind of media attention and play that the last meeting between the two American League East clubs got, the result is either going to be something cataclysmic or quite a downer. What if the Yankees just blow everyone out of the water? Again. What if the Red Sox take on crushing injuries to Pedro Martinez and Curt Schilling?

* Major League steroid scandal

Here’s a scary thought: fans actually getting sick of the home run ball. Say the Rawlings balls continue to pop out of the park faster than Barry Bonds pops pills. At what point does a massive home run become blas